5 Questions for 11/15/10

Another beautiful Monday!  It’s time for 5 Questions.


Question #1:  Tiger Woods just bought a new estate for a cool $50 million.  Thoughts, feelings, emotions?  (Rachel in Florida)

Jenn B.:  So I read up on this today at work, and I have to admit, I am a little impressed.  Tiger bought a 10 acre spread on Jupiter Island, FL back in 2006, and immediately demolished the house that was there.  My guess is that the ceilings weren’t conducive to stripper poles, and there weren’t enough rooms to house all his trophies.  Rumor has it that he is going to have a room comprised completely of mirrors, just so he can see how godly he looks from all angles, as he fornicates with mermaids, Grecian Goddesses, and whatever other mystical creatures his money can buy.

Eric Prae:  But does he have a pyramid of ladies like Derrick Rose???

(watch the clip)

 

Question #2:  The State of New York is trying to ban the sale of “flavored alcoholic beverages with caffeine, because they are dangerous and appeal to young drinkers”.  What do you guys think about this?  (Chris in Upstate, NY)

Jenn B.:  Chalk this up to another reason that I am happy to live in Tampa.  There isn’t a better way to start off a Friday night than with a few tall boys of Sparks!  It really helps get your adrenaline flowing (to the point where you feel your eyes are going to burst directly out of your skull).  New York is becoming less and less fun by the day.  First, they get pissed because Spitzer was using tax payers’ money to buy hookers and blow, and now they are telling you that you can’t get all hopped up on energy drinks and blackout by 10pm?  Party shitters.

Eric Prae:  Dear NY State:

The WHOLE POINT of caffeinated beverages mixed with alcohol is for muscled-up, frat boy, Affliction wearing idiots to make a complete fool of themselves at the bar (Well, those guys and Jenn).  Banning this trashy swill will not affect the way I drink, but it will certainly downgrade my tavern experience and give me less to write about!  Letting these idiots loose in public and watching them pay $15 for a RedBull and Vodka is not only humane, it is needed in our society.  What will these uncivilized apes do now for refreshment?  Who will I make fun of to the point that they swing at me?  Why does the state of NY ban everything fun?

When the Jersey Shore gets cancelled because the guys were too tired after drinking Coors Light to beat someone up or pound out a chick, you will regret this horrible decision.

Eric King:  As long as you don’t ban Four Loko.  Jerks. ßHey Eric, I don’t mean to piss on your parade, but they are banning Four Loko in Florida.  I kid you not.  Looks like Montana is going to be the new “hot spot” for spring break.  Love, Jenn

 

Question #3:  The Giants spent like a billion dollars on a new stadium, and then on national TV, they can’t figure out how to turn the lights on?  Epic fail!!!  (Tim in NY)

Jenn B.:  First of all, I hate you.  I think it was actually a very wise and strategic move on the Giants’ part.  They know that half their team is filled with big black men (yay) so they figured, if they didn’t pay their power bill , and made it real dark in there, then they would actually be able to sneak by and score against the Cowboys.  Too bad Jerry Jones saw right through this plan, and he tossed a few million dollars to the power company, and he got those lights turned right back on!

Eric Prae:  First thing that came to my mind when the power went out:  I wonder how many people in the pitch dark upper deck are getting it on right now???  And it is this type of thought process that caused my girlfriend to dump me.

Maybe the NFL can use this to make games like that one more interesting.  When one team gets ahead by more than 14 points, turn the lights out on the side of the field that they are trying to score at!  Also, with fewer lights, it will be easier to nap at a Bills or Bengals game.

Eric King:  You know what is a real epic fail?  Jerry Jones spending billions on his new stadium with that expensive ass jumbotron, and having a crappy football team!



 
Question #4:  Team Struggle – Why does everybody hate the Miami Heat and LeBron James?  (Daniel in Tampa Bay)

Jenn B.:  Well, I don’t hate them or LeBron, and neither does Eric Prae.  Therefore, your “everybody” theory has been disproved.  I know where you were trying to go with that question, and my answer is, “because they are haters.”  It is human nature to envy others and want what they have, if you don’t have it.  Fans and other players either want to be LeBron, or they want him on THEIR team.  I love the Celtics, and I would have loved for LeBron to have gone to Boston- but we have enough superstars up there, and D-Wade needed a friend.

I would say that “I know the feeling” of being hated on.  But, let’s be serious.  I don’t know what that’s like- (see last week’s survey results. OHHHHHHH!!!!)

Eric Prae:  Hate LeBron?  I LOVE LEBRON!  This year’s NBA final with Kobe vs. LeBron is going to be epic!  Just wait until next year when my main man Melo goes to the Knicks!

Something that I do hate?  I don’t get the Miami Heat on my cable.  I get the network for the Orlando Magic, and I also get the local feed for the Chicago Bulls (I have no idea why), but I can’t get the Miami Heat network?  I would call someone and complain, but we may or may not be stealing our cable.

Eric King:  I love LeBron!  He just wants to win rings and get paid.  As 50 cent once said:  “If they hate, let em hate, and watch the money pile up…”



Question #5:  For the fifth and final question we give you: The Struggle Moment of the Week!  Thanks to Sarah from NY for the original idea.

Eric Prae:  I was at Sligh park on Thursday playing beach volleyball.  Sligh park is one of the hidden gems of Tampa.  Right in the middle of the ghetto that is downtown Tampa is two beach volleyball courts with regulation nets, regulation lines and really deep beach sand.  It even has lights for night time play!  The best part is that our group of friends is really the only people that play there.  No leagues, no bar, no crowds to get away from your court, and you don’t have to drive all the way to the beach.  It is beach volleyball bliss…in the middle of the ghetto.

I was warming up on the side of the court with my friend Doug when a short, very stocky man staggered down the sidewalk.  He was about 40 years old, but he looked like he had seen better days.  He even had a sweet ponytail.  This man and the girl he was walking with stopped to watch us play.  Then he said one of the funniest things of all time:

Crazy Dude:  Hey!

We all turned and looked at him outside the fence.

Crazy Dude:  I love volleyball!  Was volleyball champ at Gulf Correctional!!!

He then put his hand up in some type of brotherhood greeting and staggered away.  All the rest of us could do was put our hands up and cheer for him.

Eric Prae:  Did he just say “Gulf Correctional”, like the prison?

Doug:  Yup.

That is how you struggle.
 
 


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